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View Likes PostPosted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 12:36 pm 

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Alright, so we all know that people have preferences when writing, be it a sexual scene, a violent one, or even how far they'll take profane language. From a personal standpoint, there are very few "hard limits" that I have, very few trigger warnings because, in my mind, I can separate the fiction from the reality and keep that line very clearly defined (not to say others can't, of course). But I know that there are limits that people have, we all do at some point or another, and we often find them when writing with other people. They'll make a remark about being okay with something, and some of the time their line is one of your own, whereas others it's a line you respect and don't cross.

I'm curious, are there any lines that you (general you) won't cross? What triggers are you alright with writing and how far will you take it, be it detail or otherwise, in a hypothetical situation where all parties involved are okay with the content in question?

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View Likes PostPosted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 1:39 pm 

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Non consensual sex.

I don't care what kind of excuses my partner has for wanting to write non-con with me, it is not happening. Never. If my character doesn't want it, they're not doing it. The end.

I think that's one of my only ones, though, if not the only one.

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View Likes PostPosted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 1:44 pm 

Sort of back.

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^this too. And I'm even pickier, as in: if my character wants to have sex, but they say they won't do (insert any specifics here) and my partner tries to push the matter, they're losing a partner.

And Nazism related themes. I just don't do it, ever, and there's no way in hell I will (yes, I have had someone try to press me into it).


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View Likes PostPosted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 3:43 pm 

limits are a mindset

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Couple things:

Sex: I don't really write sex scenes. It isn't because I can't. It's just that I've been in situations where the people I wrote with either attempted to force me into writing it when I decided that it was too early for the characters involved, they got mad and quit, or simply because the idea behind that particular would-be-sex-scene was hella cheesy. Cheesy **** turns me off, period. And I am by no means an expert on writing smut. That doesn't mean that I wouldn't write sexual contents with a worthy partner but if I do, I won't fade it to black. I'm grown-up enough to take it all the way to the end and as explicitly or implicitly as possible if you want. If writing sex scenes is something that makes them feel uncomfortable that they would rather use the fade-out, then they shouldn't even mention wanting to write it in the first place. Waste of time. Also if I'm going to write it, it isn't to be plotted. I will hint to it in my posts in one way or another so that it happens naturally and you can do just the same. If we pick up on these hints then there is an amazing chemistry present and one yet to be explored.

Romance: I'm attracted to people's writing styles, the personalities behind the characters, the flaws. My character will not fall in love with yours even if they're Marilyn Monroe or William Holden back from the dead. Your character can be the hottest **** in the Milky Way but that doesn't mean that I will co-write romance with you just because Miss or Mister wants to. So don't force it on me. Had a very bad experience with this one that left a bitter taste in my mouth. I don't mind plotting the romance with you for you too have the right to speak your mind but don't get mad at me and quit if I think our characters are not compatible romantically or sexually.

Mary-sue/Godmodding: I'm very laid back and I put a lot of trust into my RP partners when we're writing 1x1s, not all of them, but some of them who I know will respect their limits. For certain scenes to progress, it is important that permission is given to the other to move the characters around when necessary for the story to run smoothly. But we should notify one another when something like that is about to happen just in case one of us wanted to act on something before moving the scene forward. And while permission is granted to move my chars around, don't speak for them, don't act for them.

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View Likes PostPosted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 4:11 pm 

Sort of back.

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Incest (I have had someone - not here, thank God) request to write a roleplay in which mother and son slept together. Just no.

Pedophilia. I have also had people request this (not here either). It's sad I even have to include this and the above here.

Godmodding is also a pretty big no. Specially when used to push my character way too far, i.e., speaking for them, making them do things I did not previously agree with. I used to give my partners a little leeway, but after too many problems, I decided everything has to be discussed with me. Less headaches this way.


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View Likes PostPosted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 5:26 pm 


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Non-consensual sex is one of my no-go's. In fact, sex in general I prefer to "fade to black" because it's not just tasteless but awkward in my mind. Sex IRL has all the funky sounds and smells and I'd rather not go into any detail at all in my writing. At that point it's basically porn and that makes me uncomfortable. o_o Every time I'm in that situation with a partner my mind just starts going, "I'm a jellyfish stop looking at me." Not for me, no no no.

And, maybe this is a strange one but... when things start getting overly dramatic it's just a turn off. Not that it's all blood and gore. I don't enjoy roleplay when things get totally serious and starts to focus on emotions or real life problems. So when a character turns into a werewolf and starts crying and running away into the woods, leaving mine with only the option to chase after them... errrrr. I think I'm just... done by then. Things tend to spiral into a melodramatic soap opera from there.


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 7:06 pm 

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I don't even really want to touch up on my opinion of Pedophilia (Just no).
Incest is one of those, if you are going to be involved with an rp related to that, at the very most it would end up being a side thing that is only one sided for one character and never brought up seriously, so more like a case of being too attached to a sibling is really as far as I am comfortable with going for that, and only in the case that it cannot be avoided. (Incest is really just a no for me on general)

Other than that I cannot really think of anything furthering involvement with the above topics.
I am not Homophobic, and I am not interested in the same sex. Yet would still be somewhat comfortable with doing a boyxboy love story, or girlxgirl. I would be slightly uncomfortable in the boyxboy sex scene if there was one, but would really be able to just say (It is a good romance rp, so I really do not mind.) Any raw straight up boyxboy smut or girlxgirl smut is a no for me though, it would have to be rooted to some kind of romance.
I am young, and am not allowed in the Cave. (Many mistake me for being older then what my actual age is. Its really quite a common thing for me. lol) Though am comfortable with sex scenes and have partook in rp's involving them with friends, and have even implemented some of those in a story or two of mine off site, I do not really draw the line at it.

That being said, a forced sexual encounter to a character who has not consented is a no-no for me unless it is a very special case. (Already determined what is going to happen, and as long as it DOES further the story. It is a thin rope though, and anytime I would cut that thin rope and I would draw the line so to speak.) Some rp I understand may involved scenes like this, such as in realistic violent rp's, or an attempt at medieval like realism rp. Yet again, I would really just want to be sure it furthers the story in the case that it may lead to a characters emotional change and therefor furthering the plot, if so, I would want it to pass by as ideally fast as possible, to get to that point. Maybe even a fade to black for this one particular type of scene.

I am not okay with rp's about straight up sex and rape. (Like I said before, No raw smut that is just hard-core pornographic text.)
----
I also find myself able to be involved with dark rp (Lots of death and the like.) Though I get uncomfortable if children are being killed in the rp, and may find myself dropping out. That also being said, if it is a vampire child who is essentially immortal to aging, or any other type of supernatural situation, and just has a child's body, then I could live with that over the slightly uncomfortable feelings.
(Keep in mind, the mind of the supernatural char would have to be adult like, if they still have child like personalities, I would not want to be involved... don't know what it is about it, it just doesn't sit well with me.)

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View Likes PostPosted: Wed Jul 15, 2015 3:42 pm 

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stardust wrote:
And, maybe this is a strange one but... when things start getting overly dramatic it's just a turn off. Not that it's all blood and gore. I don't enjoy roleplay when things get totally serious and starts to focus on emotions or real life problems. So when a character turns into a werewolf and starts crying and running away into the woods, leaving mine with only the option to chase after them... errrrr. I think I'm just... done by then. Things tend to spiral into a melodramatic soap opera from there.


While not a no-go for me, I really feel this. Fortunately, I've gotten better. Back in the early, early days when I barely spoke English, my character would have chased after them and probably proclaimed her love. Now, though? I'd take the chance to make my character shrug, say "what a weirdo", and go about their merry way. End of thread, end of awkwardness!

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View Likes PostPosted: Wed Jul 15, 2015 7:28 pm 

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This has luckily not been a problem here, at least not so far, but on my former roleplaying page, people tended to play really abusive relationship, but paint it as romantic, and that is just a huge no-no for me. If things starts looking abusive, and my partner do not realise this, not even when I have pointed it out, then I am outta there, I do not have time for that.
Furthermore, as a lot of other people said, then I am not comfortable with rape, or sexual assault. I cannot see how it would further the plot, unless you are trying to prove that you character is a disgusting human being, so I am extremely uncomfortable with that, and would rather not have it appear in my roleplays at all.
Generally, I am not extremely comfortable with writing sex scenes or smut. I can do it, surely, but I only want to write such scenes, if it makes sense for the plot, or for our characters.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 15, 2015 8:15 pm 

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stardust wrote:
Non-consensual sex is one of my no-go's. In fact, sex in general I prefer to "fade to black" because it's not just tasteless but awkward in my mind. Sex IRL has all the funky sounds and smells and I'd rather not go into any detail at all in my writing. At that point it's basically porn and that makes me uncomfortable. o_o Every time I'm in that situation with a partner my mind just starts going, "I'm a jellyfish stop looking at me." Not for me, no no no.


I'm often in the middle because I'd prefer not to fade to black if sex happens, but I don't really want to detail it out either. I'd rather make it quick and gloss it a bit, but not skip it entirely. But I find people either want one or the other, to fade and skip, or they specifically want to write smut and it gets to be too much. Even in an erotic-themed RP, I don't really want to dwell on any particular sex scene too long since there's only so much you can say about it before it gets really stupid.

I suppose, to explain it a bit more precisely, I'd want to go into the thoughts and emotions the character is having during their sexual encounter, but not so much the detailed description




Non-con stuff... if a roleplaying partner I was super compatible with was like, hey, I know this is kinda off but I've been craving a non-con rp, I might do it... we'd have to be super close though, more like, if a long-term romantic partner came to me wanting a rape fantasy irl, i'd think about it.


But my real line is... springing stuff on me without talking to me about it first. Since, as I mentioned above, my boundaries are less inherent to what I will or will not explore in a story, and more about friendship-level with the person I'm writing. I won't do explicit sex scenes with someone I'm not friends with, probably someone I've had conversations about sexuality with... and other stuff, under the right circumstances I might to literally anything (even, say, a male/male relationship, which otherwise, I have zero interest in), but I have to care about who I'm playing with, if I'm not going to care about the story itself...

I've told my story about the yaoi mpreg shota mermaid story on this site before... it was definitely the crowning moment of having stuff sprung on me.


My other line is verisimilitude. Even in fantasy, or exaggerated shonen anime, or something else weird, things have to make sense, and anything that knocks me out of that reality will break the story for me.
Unless we're doing some kind of Bobobo/weekly world news/acid trip story where sense is just thrown out the window...

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View Likes PostPosted: Wed Jul 15, 2015 11:23 pm 

It's my party, and I'll cry if I want to

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I'll admit, I'm a little surprised by the amount of people uncomfortable writing non-consensual scenes. Obviously, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that stance, but to me, there is a time and a place.

For instance, Eferhilda and I have a roleplay together taking place in medieval times. She plays the prince that my princess married, but they do not love each other. Have no feelings for one another; in fact, he tried to have her ambushed before her arrival as their marriage was purely for political gain and to form an alliance, to stop a war. So, the night they had to consummate the relationship, it was non-consensual. The way it happened, while it could have been glazed over, faded out, and left to play out the aftermath in the coming posts, it wouldn't have had the same impact. He held no care for her comfort, is in fact gay, and was purely fulfilling a duty, and she's left to deal with that. She's a victim of circumstance and position, and I don't think that it could have been played out properly, her emotions and the weight of ordeal as a whole as impactful, without the scene being in the roleplay itself.

I have also had characters with abusive childhoods. They were the brainchildren of others, but I brought them to life. I never went into explicit detail so I guess my hardline would be writing out the act of sexually abusing a child, but I will glaze over it. The character in question, a changed vampire, still has a violent reaction whenever she smells whiskey. It instantly brings up those memories and is an instant trigger for her. It doesn't matter what she's doing or who she's around, her mind will automatically revert to each and every one of those times that that smell was present and her body will react, be it through expelling of the contents of her stomach, or otherwise.

When it comes to abusive relationships, I think Fearless Sissy can vouch that I have (and still am) writing one where the character doesn't realize that it is, in fact, abusive. She's caught in a love triangle of sorts, the character Fearless roots against is a vampire who is controlling, manipulative...but has weaseled his way in to the point that, despite their relationship ending when he called it off, she's considering going back into it as he's asked it of her. Meanwhile, she has someone who actually cares for her, who looks out for her, who treats her as she should be treated; but the first is a habit she can't shake.

Some may find it odd, but I'm also comfortable writing scenarios I, myself, have been in. One plotline that I've explored and will explore is stalking and the obsession that comes with it. For me, there is a very clear line between fiction and reality and, though what I'm writing I'd never do in real life or even consider doing, I will write out.

I think there's a taboo when it comes to roleplaying things out that needs to be addressed, not directed at anyone in this group, but roleplay as a whole. So many novels I read in school held content of rape, of child abuse, of worse, and authors are praised for it, for pushing the boundaries. But, roleplay as a whole, writing it seems to be a touchy subject. I understand needing to trust a partner and make sure no lines are crossed, respecting people's boundaries, but I feel like some of the darker subjects are moved away from hastily.

Once more, this isn't directed at anyone specific, so I hope it doesn't come off as such. Just my view on lines as mine are few and far between.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 16, 2015 3:06 am 

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I think the reason it's more touchy in roleplaying, is the intent is more in question. Especially if you don't talk about it.
There are a lot of people out there who use roleplaying as a means of being manipulative or controlling, and the knowledge of that can send up flags for people.

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View Likes PostPosted: Thu Jul 16, 2015 6:16 am 

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The thing is, I have had roleplays feature rape before, but only because it made sense for the plot.
I had a character who was a prostitute, and he was raped by a customer, because he turned said customer down, due to the fact that he was his boyfriend's estranged dad. So yeah, as long as the rape makes sense for the roleplay, and for the setting they are in, then I can roll with it. It's just a thing that I would rather not do, and it's not very often I put my characters in a place where rape would make sense.

I am the same with abuse. The problem with abuse in rolepalys though, is that on the page I came from, many of the people I played with were young girls. They did not realise that what they were doing were abusive, and when I pointed it out to them, they started explaining how they found it romantic. We're talking stalking, forcing themselves onto my characters, trying to control them etc.
And all of that would have been, if they had realised what they were doing, and if I had been made aware of the fact that this was supposed to be an abusive relationship. What broke it for me, was the fact that they were still trying to paint their character as a good partner for my character, and that just doesn't really work for me.

So yeah, I guess it's, for me, more about the intent of the roleplayer, rather than the actions of their character? If that makes sense.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 16, 2015 9:37 am 

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Asteria wrote:
I'll admit, I'm a little surprised by the amount of people uncomfortable writing non-consensual scenes. Obviously, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that stance, but to me, there is a time and a place.

For instance, Eferhilda and I have a roleplay together taking place in medieval times. She plays the prince that my princess married, but they do not love each other. Have no feelings for one another; in fact, he tried to have her ambushed before her arrival as their marriage was purely for political gain and to form an alliance, to stop a war. So, the night they had to consummate the relationship, it was non-consensual. The way it happened, while it could have been glazed over, faded out, and left to play out the aftermath in the coming posts, it wouldn't have had the same impact. He held no care for her comfort, is in fact gay, and was purely fulfilling a duty, and she's left to deal with that. She's a victim of circumstance and position, and I don't think that it could have been played out properly, her emotions and the weight of ordeal as a whole as impactful, without the scene being in the roleplay itself.

I have also had characters with abusive childhoods. They were the brainchildren of others, but I brought them to life. I never went into explicit detail so I guess my hardline would be writing out the act of sexually abusing a child, but I will glaze over it. The character in question, a changed vampire, still has a violent reaction whenever she smells whiskey. It instantly brings up those memories and is an instant trigger for her. It doesn't matter what she's doing or who she's around, her mind will automatically revert to each and every one of those times that that smell was present and her body will react, be it through expelling of the contents of her stomach, or otherwise.

When it comes to abusive relationships, I think Fearless Sissy can vouch that I have (and still am) writing one where the character doesn't realize that it is, in fact, abusive. She's caught in a love triangle of sorts, the character Fearless roots against is a vampire who is controlling, manipulative...but has weaseled his way in to the point that, despite their relationship ending when he called it off, she's considering going back into it as he's asked it of her. Meanwhile, she has someone who actually cares for her, who looks out for her, who treats her as she should be treated; but the first is a habit she can't shake.

Some may find it odd, but I'm also comfortable writing scenarios I, myself, have been in. One plotline that I've explored and will explore is stalking and the obsession that comes with it. For me, there is a very clear line between fiction and reality and, though what I'm writing I'd never do in real life or even consider doing, I will write out.

I think there's a taboo when it comes to roleplaying things out that needs to be addressed, not directed at anyone in this group, but roleplay as a whole. So many novels I read in school held content of rape, of child abuse, of worse, and authors are praised for it, for pushing the boundaries. But, roleplay as a whole, writing it seems to be a touchy subject. I understand needing to trust a partner and make sure no lines are crossed, respecting people's boundaries, but I feel like some of the darker subjects are moved away from hastily.

Once more, this isn't directed at anyone specific, so I hope it doesn't come off as such. Just my view on lines as mine are few and far between.


I suppose I can get behind that all, and like I said anyway, I would have done something similar if only it was purely to further the story and was important to it. There really was no part of me just saying "I don't want to do this, its too much." It was more like such situations made me feel bad myself, that really is the main thing for me. So yeah, I suppose I would do something as such if I really, really, really decided it was best for the rp or if the plot was amazingly well done, as I do not like dropping rp's.

I suppose some of my lines are thin ones that I hate to cross and bugs me until it is over with. I used to be able to distinguish myself from my writing a bunch, but that is really only when I am in the zone writing one of my stories, as I don't even really think about the words I am writing if that makes sense at all. In rp it is a different story, post by post I actually end up re reading my work more then I usually do, and going over it before posting, so I started to kind of get hit by some of the few things when I was off site involving sexual relation, being none consensual. Then came kids, and while I could go with an abusive relationship in rp and handle that well. It really comes down to murder to a child as something I do not like to write about, off text, I guess it does not quite bug me as much.
---
Sorry, I know you are not picking on any of us, it's just that your post kind of made me realize some things.

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 21, 2015 9:34 pm 
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Its definitely an interesting question and usually cause I don't have many boundaries I let other people I roleplay or do things with define the boundaries cause my compass is a little morally askew. I'd say for anything touchy or serious or dark and perhaps demented whether rape, slavery, or genocide, or fanaticism and all those kinds of really hard to understand or delicately handle themes its always about context which can be hard to make clear which is why it makes sense many become uncomfortable and avoid them. I think though in some sense writing is a good way to even intentionally offend or make people a little uncomfortable cause those kinds of feelings can prompt one to think not saying that always is the case and not saying it should be the intent.

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View Likes PostPosted: Fri Aug 21, 2015 10:20 pm 

Sort of back.

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I was thinking further about this matter as I rode the bus today, and I ended up reaching the conclusion that I don't have any set in stone boundaries. I read over all of the lines I listed, and realized that I have actually done all of them with a former partner. But then again, they were all previously agreed upon, treated in a tasteful way (not purely for shock value) and we were long time partners who knew each other well, and knew we were free to say 'no' and 'let's stop here' at any point without the other trying to push for a scene or theme their partner was uncomfortable with.

So, I think for me, it's much more about feeling safe and comfortable with my partner, and feeling that this person won't try to push me past the point where for some reason I feel slightly not okay with something and ask them to please stop or gloss over that specific detail or scene. And for that reason, I'll only open myself to certain themes with people I know are doing it for the sake of creating a story and will be respectful if I hit the brakes at some point.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 21, 2015 11:53 pm 

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Male x male and pedophile stuff are about my only hard no areas. I really don't care to write wxm scenes if I'm writing the woman either but I'll do it if the partner is good. Other than that I really don't have and limits. I've written the hardest non-con imaginable and I'm comfortable with it. It's fantasy not something I crave in real life. Though I do tend to stay away from non-con plots as they tend to fizzle out pretty quick.

I don't like the fade to black thing either though. No I'm not into writing only porn. But when sex does happen I want to read every detail about it.

As for violence I'm cool with writing the most brutal stuff imaginable. Especially if it furthers the plot. Sure sometimes gratuitous violence is fun, but there generally needs to be a point behind it. Even if that point is only to show how truly deranged a character is.


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 22, 2015 12:59 am 
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Just to get this out, Iam comfortable with sex scense not because it turns me on or anything. The romance of a sex scene is what intriuges me and gives further depth and emotion to the stiry. I don't write sex scense just to say 'I boned the hell out if that ****ing' or 'Yea that was a goid ****'. Theres no emotion in that type of sex scene. (Hope that makes sense)

As for brawing my line... animal sex. Iam 100% not interested in having hair in my charas teeth or anywhere else. Its simply gross to me. I dont do animal x human sex of any kind. If its not something I would do in real life then its not something I would do in rp. Simply put.

From here I will just make a list of the no no stuff as mist if it has already been mentioned above.

Incest
Same gender sex (because I have never experienced it and dont want to look stupid because i dont understand how to manipulate it into words.)
Pedo sex/relations or any kind
Rape


Think that is it, I will think of more when Iam more sober.

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 22, 2015 1:27 am 
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Life is a dark place, bad things can happen to good people. In my mind this can evolve into a good role playing experience. After 10 years of writing I can honestly say, that difficult situations written well. Make the best moments. I write to connect with others. Some writers distance themselves from their characters. Others choose to indulge in their creativity. I shamelessly involve myself in my writing. Is it real life? No, of course not, however I cannot write without throwing some of myself into it. It makes for a well rounded persona. Some people may frown upon it but I have made many friends across the world who share this philosophy.

I tend to push writers in a world they get lost in. It is thrilling and better than being at my desk all day working. I only allow what I can mentally handle. Rape? Some times a necessary evil in a plot. Incest? Maybe not my character is directly involved... Maybe she is... Maybe a side character has a dark secret? Who knows. Pedophilia? Maybe a vision of the past, maybe a haunting reality that has defined a subject's current persona? You never know. We all have our demons, so do characters.

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 22, 2015 5:20 pm 
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Beasitily
Incest
Pedos
Scat\watersprots\vomit
Romance- I just find it very boring
Sues\stues
Fade to black

I rather enjoy sex scenes and like non con in RP as long as its treated like the traumatic dark thing it is. I can not stand Pod Person Syndrome. It where a character suffers through some traumatic event and acts as if it never happned. I'm not talking about repressed memories, they act as if it never happned and it only comes up when there's a chance to cause drama or when they have a chance to get into the pants of some hwat male CC.

Mpreg- I'm on the fence about it. I can't see it ever happening to a human male but to a non human? Well it depends on the non human.


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